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I haven’t publicly said this anywhere yet but last week I lost my wonderful grandad. I’m struggling with my grief at the moment and am stuck somewhere between being ok and wanting to break down. 

I woke up super early this morning from a horrible dream where my bellybutton was falling apart. After a bit of research into dream interpretations I discovered the following…

Seems about right… 

An annual Rowans Hospice event which is hosted very locally to us each year caught the attention of both Maxwell and I given the recent events and also as the date marks another sad anniversary in Maxwells family. 

So armed with a flask of hot chocolate and warm coats we walked to the end of the road and attended my first ever lake of lights service. 

It was lovely, we donated to the charity for a light each for my grandad and Abi and after some carols and a short service we added our lights to the floats and sent them out into the lake. 

In a moment of silence, with tears rolling down my face I tried to say goodbye to a man I dearly loved. 

I won’t go on (typing and tears don’t mix) but instead will share with you a few photos…